{"id":1201,"date":"2004-11-08T00:10:57","date_gmt":"2004-11-08T05:10:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/example.org\/getting_along_w"},"modified":"2004-11-08T00:10:57","modified_gmt":"2004-11-08T05:10:57","slug":"getting_along_w","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/?p=1201","title":{"rendered":"Getting along with others – lessons from a deer feeding station"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Foursome\"<\/a>
I have been watching our local wildlife for some time and I’ve observed some behavior that may have some applicability to life in general, possibly to work situations as well. <\/p>\n

My first conclusion is that it’s easy to get along with those who don’t threaten our place in the food chain. It’s more difficult when others threaten to dimish our food supply, or steal our place in the limelight.<\/p>\n

My second conclusion is that animals want the attention of other animals, just as people strive to get attention from other people.<\/p>\n

When different species share the feeding trough, the sense of
\ncompetition occasionally vanishes. In the photo above two deer eat
\nplacidly while two squirrels stuff their faces with corn. I have seen
\ndeer and raccoons sharing the same feeding trough, while one deer was
\ntrying to drive other deer away. <\/p>\n

In this back yard feeding area, the apparency of scarcity is the
\ndriver in most conflicts. When I used to put out a small amount of
\ncorn, there was continual tension in the feeding area and flailing
\nhooves would greet other deer crowding in to eat.<\/p>\n

When I put in a larger feeding trough, the tensions lessened, but
\nthere were some deer that insisted on enforcing a pecking order. I
\ndeliberately frustrated these alpha females and males by adding
\nadditional feeding stations so that any hungry deer could eat
\nundisturbed. <\/p>\n

The dominant animals went crazy running from one feeding station to
\nanother trying to control access to the food supply. The lesser animals
\nwould simply melt away and reform at another feeding station.  What was
\nhappening was that these lesser deer were eating together and ignoring
\nthe alpha animals. As a result, the alpha animals were being left out
\nof the normal feeding time social activity. The alpha deer soon lapsed
\ninto apathy and changed their aggressive behavior towards the other
\ndeer, at least while they were my back yard.<\/p>\n

Deer are very social creatures and they touch frequently and eat
\nwith muzzles very close together. Many times I have seen four or five
\ndeer eating with heads together even though there was much open space
\nat the feeding trough. <\/p>\n

When the alpha animals were being ignored by the group at large,
\ntheir pecking order enforcement activity seemed to collapse. The other
\ndeer just didn’t seem to care.<\/p>\n

In a work situation or in life situations, there are those who fear
\na scarcity of admiration or attention. Every action they take is for
\nthe purpose of gaining attention or admiration. It’s all about them,
\nyou see.<\/p>\n

They will attempt to restrict access to their presence. They select
\nwho they will eat with and socialize with in an effort to make their
\ncompany valuable. By excluding you from activities, they hope to exert
\ncontrol over you.<\/p>\n

If you recognize what they are doing and don’t take it personally,
\nyou can turn the tables on them. Develop your own contacts and make
\nfriends based upon your own needs. Do not do this in retaliation for
\nbeing snubbed, that is not how this works. Just do not pay them any
\nspecial attention. People who are set on maintaining a popularity-based
\npecking order are doing it so that others will admire them and compete
\nfor their attention.<\/p>\n

When you ignore them, you suddenly become interesting to them. If
\nyou keep on ignoring them, they may even begin attacking you so that
\nyou will pay attention to them. Don’t take the bait. Find other things
\nand people to admire. Be politely bored, if you wish, but don’t give
\nthem any more attention than anyone else. Don’t natter about them,
\ndon’t talk about them, just get on with your life and be as creative as
\nyou can be.<\/p>\n

If you manage to do this, you will find that you have become
\ninteresting to a lot of different people. Enjoy yourself, but remain
\ninterested in other people and you will never lack for company.<\/p>\n

You will find that it is far better to be interested<\/em> than to be interesting<\/em>. It is also saner.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\"Foursome\"<\/a>
I have been watching our local wildlife for some time and I’ve observed some behavior that may have some applicability to life in general, possibly to work situations as well. <\/p>\n

My first conclusion is that it’s easy to get along with those who don’t threaten our place in the food chain. It’s more difficult when others threaten to dimish our food supply, or steal our place in the limelight.<\/p>\n

My second conclusion is that animals want the attention of other animals, just as people strive to get attention from other people.<\/p>\n

Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1794],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3R4iK-jn","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1201"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1201"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1201\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1201"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1201"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1201"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}