{"id":360,"date":"2008-05-25T08:48:32","date_gmt":"2008-05-25T12:48:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/example.org\/find-out-whats"},"modified":"2008-05-25T08:48:32","modified_gmt":"2008-05-25T12:48:32","slug":"find-out-whats","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/?p=360","title":{"rendered":"30 seconds to find out what&#8217;s wrong with you"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I was feeling becalmed between the rush of early Spring and the<br \/>\ndoldrums of Summer and I remembered this uncannily accurate, online,<br \/>\nself-diagnosis system.<\/p>\n<p> It was just as I feared. I need to change my ways. <\/p>\n<table cellpadding=\"4\" style=\"border: 3px outset rgb(238, 255, 238); margin: 10px; background: rgb(238, 255, 238) none repeat scroll 0% 50%; -moz-background-clip: -moz-initial; -moz-background-origin: -moz-initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: -moz-initial;\">\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td colspan=\"2\" style=\"border: 1px inset ; padding: 5px; background: rgb(187, 238, 187) none repeat scroll 0% 50%; -moz-background-clip: -moz-initial; -moz-background-origin: -moz-initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: -moz-initial; text-align: center;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/thesurrealist.co.uk\/disease\">Doctor Unheimlich<\/a> has diagnosed me with<br \/><strong>StLawrenceosis<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td align=\"right\"><strong>Cause<\/strong>:<\/td>\n<td>old library books<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td align=\"right\"><strong>Symptoms<\/strong>:<\/td>\n<td>vague second-degree burns, slightly pointy ears, slightly bendy arms<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td align=\"right\"><strong>Cure<\/strong>:<\/td>\n<td>expensive biofeedback devices<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td colspan=\"2\" style=\"border: 1px inset ; padding: 5px; background: rgb(187, 238, 187) none repeat scroll 0% 50%; -moz-background-clip: -moz-initial; -moz-background-origin: -moz-initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: -moz-initial; text-align: center;\">\n<form method=\"get\" action=\"http:\/\/thesurrealist.co.uk\/disease\" style=\"margin: 0px;\">\n<p>Enter your name, for your own diagnosis:<input type=\"text\" size=\"9\" name=\"p\" style=\"font-size: xx-small;\" \/><input type=\"submit\" value=\"Go\" style=\"background: rgb(187, 238, 187) none repeat scroll 0% 50%; -moz-background-clip: -moz-initial; -moz-background-origin: -moz-initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: -moz-initial; font-size: xx-small;\" \/><\/p>\n<\/form>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p>Now that my illness is named, there is nothing else I can complain about. <\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><strong>DISCLAIMER: Results may vary. <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Talk to your Mother if unsatisfied with your diagnosis, or change your name.<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Important Note: Using your full name will expose an entirely different aspect of your current condition.<strong><br \/><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I was feeling becalmed between the rush of early Spring and the doldrums of Summer and I remembered this uncannily accurate, online, self-diagnosis system. It was just as I feared. I need to change my ways. Doctor Unheimlich has diagnosed &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/?p=360\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1824],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3R4iK-5O","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/360"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=360"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/360\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=360"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=360"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/makingripples.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=360"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}