The key to enjoying the game of life is to play it in a self-determined manner.
"Easier said than done," you may say, but this is an absolute
necessity if you are to stay reasonably sane.
If others control
everything you do, you are experiencing a kind of slavery, no matter
how kindly these others treat you.
You normally have some control over your life, unless you have
broken enough of societies rules that you are deprived of liberty.
On the other hand, far too many of us stupidly give up one freedom
after another in order to gain favor with the corporate elite and keep
a fat salary coming in.
You will occasionally encounter a hiring manager who interviews you
and keeps you off balance all during the interview and yet wants to
hire you. Run, do not walk, out of there. This is a variety of toxic
individual who will demonstrate his or her insanity constantly by
keeping you in check or off balance as long as you work for them.
If you strive to get their approval by pleasing them, you will get
led around in circles and will be constantly reminded that you are
being kept on only because of their charitable nature because your work
is woefully deficient. After a while you will begin to believe it and
will be grateful to them. Eeew! Yuck! You need a severe reality
adjustment if that is the case.
These people like to keep their employees anxious and afraid for
their jobs. They may even pay high starting salaries to attract willing
victims. Once you are on board this madhouse, you will find your
confidence waning almost immediately. You will be made wrong almost
every day and if you stick it out, determined to get them to approve of
you, you will be bitterly disappointed.
Some of you may snort and think, "What company would allow such
behavior!" This behavior is usually invisible in a large company
because this kind of manager is constantly sucking up to higher levels
of management. In a smaller company, this behavior is tolerated because
the person doing it is the owner or a relative.
It really doesn’t matter whether the company is large or small or
whether this manager promises you rewards for your hard work. If you
are not being allowed to use your judgment while carrying out your
duties, you are merely a "gofer", a minion, no matter how much they pay
You will find gofers close to the highest levels in almost any
organization. Some executives like to keep minions close to them as
though they are fashion accessories. You will not survive well as a
fashion accessory or as a minion.
Far better that you choose a path that lets you have more control
over your life. Take responsibility for everything that happens to you
and you will soon be well on your way to living a self-determined life.
There is much more to be said about this, but I think you have the
basic idea now.
One more tip: Try to cause only those effects that others can
experience easily. You will be amazed how this uncomplicates your life.
(This originally appeared September 5,2005.)